i have a 30 on my hand
and it stands for the things
im oh so proud of
i haven't done the things i said i wouldn't
during these 30 days
my minds been in a daze
but i haven't been in a craze
my <3 hasn't asked me
what these numbers represent
its as if he already knows
its coming up to a month
exciting isn't it
i can't even wait
but nothings going to change
when these days are over
except i can be honest and upfront
and just tell him how it goes.
sometimes im afraid he lies
and i don't know if he listens
he leaves me alone when i want him most
and the things that hurt me
don't seem to effect him half as much
and i know im falling back into old ways
but 3.. this number means so much to me
because it meant so much to me.
it it meant a lot
to the person in question
and that makes all the difference
so now i sit here
not sure of where i stand
in your eyes
in your heart
or in the place
of bliss where we once were
these writings are all over the place
i can't quite sum them up into the right words
but i guess all i need
is someone to notice, someone to care
someone to make this all matter.
because as of now, i'm not sure it does.